Crack Rock or Wicked Jumpshot

If you’re white and you like this it doesn’t make you racist. If you’re a black dude and this upsets you….Oh well, it’s the truth. Drugs, sports and rapping seems to be ambition for most black guys today. The drug game brings in money, sports bring in money, and rapping brings in money.The one thing neither one of these bring in is stability. Why is it that people want to step out on the shakiest foundation and then are surprised when they fall? Why do these things seem like the only career paths for young black men. Don’t get me wrong I’m not saying not to have dreams, but have realistic dreams and have a back up for your dreams. Drugs are illegal and the possibility of someone making it pro in a sport or big in rapping is slim. I admire my good friends Phonso Ellis and Terrance Cosby. They have dreams in their respective sports and can go to the next level but yet they still secure with back-up plans if they don’t make it and by back up plans I mean EDUCATION!!!! Education seems to be a word that young black men are afraid of and this isnt me just talking and knowing what I’m talking about. Check the numbers on how many of us graduate from high school, the numbers on how many of us to college and then how many of us actually graduate from college. Then we complain when we cant get ahead in life, when the question is how can we get ahead when we don’t have the essential tool for us to. The things that I’ve come to find out is that our culture is so caught up in instant gratification and the thing with education is that it’s not instant, it’s a process. A process that many don’t want to take because there is nothing it for them at that time. I mean even Lil Wayne has a college degree in English. Drugs, rapping and sports brings fame, recognition, and possibly money. The keyword though of that last statement though is POSSIBLY, which means there’s a chance it won’t come. And like I said the possibility of that money coming is very unlikely. So what do you do when it doesn’t come? How long are you staying with your mama? How do you support yourself? How do you suport a family? How can you be a man when you don’t know where your going in life. Moral of this blog: Go against the grain. Better back yourself up.

Poem: Passion For You

I love you, I long for you and want you more than anything. You bring joy to my heart and a fire to my soul. What it is about you, I just dont know. I've tried to figure that out for so long, but maybe its better left unknown. You illuminate dark spots in my soul. You make me sad, you make me cry. But your presence brings me to an all time high. You are transparent but yet I see your presence, I feel your touch. I love your hug, I cherish your embrace. I want you and everything that comes with you. What I guess Im saying is, I have this strong lust for this girl name Life and everything she has in store for me in the day and the night.

Poem: Chasing You

I chase you but still don’t know how far I have left to go to see you, or if I ever will. I can only see you in my mind, in my sleep, just waiting for the day your existence is my reality. You keep me humble but yet anxious. You give me reason to live, but yet the thought of you kills me sometimes, but yet I chase you, I commit to you hoping that you will be with me one day. Hoping that my visions of you don’t go in vain. You get my blood flowing, my heart racing and my mind thinking and that’s what encourages me to run after you, to fiend for you because once I get you, the prophecy of my life is complete. The destination in which I have longed to reach, I have finally arrived. The prize in which I strived so long in life to have, I have finally received and the beauty of it all is that it makes my life complete. And that is why I chase DREAM.

Love and Basketball

If there is any sport Love is like, it has to be basketball. You start this game when you’re a kid. Every year you learn more and more about the game and how to play it. You play on team after team, some good some bad. Then we get to that stage in our life where we just want to be on one team and a good team to finish our careers out with.

Love is like basketball. We play hard we love hard. The ball is as precious as the person in which we are with. We take care of the ball because we never want to lose it. We never want to have it taken from us. When we lose the ball we then play defense waiting to get the steal or the rebound but realize that it doesn’t remove the thought of us losing the ball in the first place and doesn’t feel as good.

Love is like basketball because when we frantically start to search for that love that we start to press. We start to speed things up trying to make things happen, trying to get that winning feeling. Trying to make something out of nothing, but in the process we end up turning the ball over and just playing out of control. Looking at basketball, the best scores come when you're patient and take your time and it’s the same way with love.

Love is basketball and we are the front office of the game. We strive to have that franchise player on our team. Yes players have come through over the years but nothing equals up to that person that can take you, be with you and carry you over the years. When we recognize that player, we go through extensive agreements to have them. Once we have them we aren’t worried about free agency, the draft and players on other teams because we have our franchise player. To us they are our superstar and we can’t wait for the day in which we can induct them in our life long Hall of Fame.

Love is basketball. We have to look at the scoreboard and ask ourselves are we winning, is it tied or are we beating ourselves by our decisions? The thing is, if it is tied, or if we are losing, how long will we continue to use the same strategy? Because looking at the scoreboard there is no time, because any given day our careers could end.

Love and Basketball: Let’s the play the game the right way.

Romance

Let me introduce you to my alter ego his name is Romance. Can he take you for a candle lit slow dance, or can he take you for a walk along the beach sands? Can Romance be there to be your tissue to wipe those tears away, or can he be there to give you that massage when you’ve had that stressful day. Sweep you off your feet, but never let you fall. Put you on a pedestal, have you standing tall. Can Romance cater to you like you are his special occasion, and can he get inside your heart and give you this love infection. If so, all you have to do is say yes, because Romance is here to meet all your needs. And he’s happy as long as it’s you he’s satisfying. He’s not concerned with himself because your satisfaction is his gratification. Any moment he gets to express his love for you is his celebration.  Romance pulls out all the stops and probably shows you some things you’ve never seen. All the things that you’ve ever wished would happen to you and the things you long for in your dreams. Open your eyes to things you’ve never seen, you heart to things its always loved and your soul to things it’s always wanted to feel. Touch your spirit and make you feel like you’ve reached heaven but you’re on earth still. Romance wants to do all of that, and put you in a relaxed state and leave you so tranquil. Soft music, candle lit dinners, flowers and rose pedals on the floor beneath your feet. People who say Romance is dead just haven’t met him because I am him and he is me.   

Poem: My Calm

I’m just so far gone, in my own zone

Please leave me alone.

Cut from life’s hurt, I'm putting nesporing on.

My soul is not at home, just what is going on?

Where did I go wrong? Where do I belong?

Caught up in this life, standing in the wind and the storm.

Recognizing that when it rains, I’m the one it’s raining on.

Seeing that people in my life are really never set in stone.

My grandma always saying that she loves me on the phone

But it never replaces the fact that my granddad is dead and gone.

Right now I feel so distant from all my friends that I know.

Who’s real and who’s not is constantly sitting on my dome.

Loops that I get thrown, lies that I’ve been told

I go distances to protect myself that I shouldn’t have to go.

Through these past 2 years, look at just how much that I have grown.

I’m just in my zone. I call this blog My Calm.

Yea, but I’m the furthest thing from calm

Dedicate this to my soul, trying to warm it from being cold.

Just drowning out my agony in the words of this poem.

But you can see it in my eyes, you can read it in my palm.

As a human you get betrayed, it’s proven and it’s known.

sitting in this desk, but what’s  going on I just don’t know.

I know I always worry, it’d be better if I don’t.

(Just how I’m feeling, Just my emotions. I apologize to you now,

Putting ya’ll in this position, but I learned from Drake don’t ask

Permission, just ask forgiveness. So forgive me.)

My life is so insane

Cause 80% of my smiles, is just me in a disguise.

And people around me cant open me up if they tried.

Cause I’m skeptical of everyone around me at this time.

They love it when I smile

unaware that it's a strain,

Taking heed to all the things

that my consciousness has been saying.

Women need attention therefore women will complain

Develop stats bout me and say that I’m the one to blame.

Trying to enjoy myself with my guys is not same,

I just wish they knew how much this all weighed like Dwayne.

It’s a weight that’s on my chest whoever spotting me is playing

So I’m lifting all alone trying not to get a sprain.

Hoping Jesus can one day do a mindset exchange.

Cause my life called and it’s just trying to go back to the old me again.

Like how I used to joke and laugh without it being a strain

But now it’s like I laugh and joke just to ease the pain.

And I can only feel this pain.

Cause in this cold world, to hold it in is to be a man.

So I’m writing out another blog, expressing me once again.

People say they love me, I just hope it’s not in vain.

Wondering why people keep mentioning my name,

I press ignore on your text, not really caring what they saying.

As a man I’m just honest, and as a lover I’m a king

With my own set of problems that be sitting on my brain.

Yep, and see this is the thang.

This simple thing as blogging is the way maintain.

The things I think while staring out the window of my class

Is the single handed reason why I move on with the past.

Change

Why is change so bad, especially successful change?  I think Drake laid it out in his song “Resistance” when he makes the statement, “What am I afraid of? This is supposed to be what dreams are made of. People I don’t have the time to hang with. Always look at me and say the same shit.(You promise me you would never change up.)” To better improve yourself sometimes means people that used to be in your life will voluntarily remove themselves, because you bettering yourself makes them feel inferior and they feel that you are changing. The reason they feel you are changing is because they have no desire to get out the mold that they are in and form a new one. Sometimes we as people do get try to improve ourselves we act differently with others, but it’s mostly because we see that in this process of progress in our lives we see that people we used to have around could possibly be the ones to bring us down. When trying to progress yourself in life, just sit back and observe how people act towards you. Your true friends will never down your progress even if they aren’t progressing themselves, but the people that say that because of you trying to change your life positively were only associates because they never knew your true ambition in the first place. Just like in business, in life when it pertains to friends, cuts may be in order. On the road of progress, the removal of excess must sometimes be done to reach your success. Moral of this blog: Don’t be resistant….

Dark Knight Feeling

“Dark Knight feeling, you die you’ll be a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become a villain”

Dark Knight feeling. A feeling of living your life trying to do the best you can and making the best name for yourself to only have try to ruin your name. So now we find ourselves in the twisted web of our death making us loved by people for our lives and the person we are, but if we keep living those same people will make us out into a villain. But hey, if they did it to Jesus and Batman what makes us think we are excempt.

Dark Knight feeling…Maybe we become a villain because no matter how good we are, how much good we do and how good our rep is, there are still people that will drag us through the mud. With that happening we have no choice but to be a villain. To let a wrath loose on everything and everybody that unreasonably comes against us to the point where we are viewed as a villain because of our change of demeanor.

Dark Knight feeling...The feeling of being tired of always being there for others when no one is there for you, so you develop a mentality of being there for yourself only and cursing all of those against you. Not really caring about much and turning cold, which is going the total opposite of who you are.

It’s funny how living and dying perceive what you will be remembered for and as, but oh well, that’s just the Dark Knight feeling. Not a hero because I’m not dead so I guess I’ll have to play the villain.